Saturday, June 23, 2012

R-E-S-P-E-C-T. Sing it Aretha.

Unless your last name is Flintstone and you live under a rock, you've no doubt heard the horrific story of the teens/preteens that tormented the poor 68 year-old bus monitor. Not content with mere bullying, they recorded their assault, and then proudly posted it to YouTube.

Fortunately, the bullying buck stopped there. The video was spread alright, but spread due to people's outrage that children would treat an elder in this way. These boys called her names, cursed at her, told her they'd stab her, cut her, p*ss on her house and sh** in her mouth, they POKED at her, and generally kept up their spawn of Satan act till she was in tears.

If you think you can stomach it, you can watch it here:






I hope...no, I know my kids not only would never ever EVER do something like this, but that they would stop punks like those in their tracks if they ever saw such a thing.

But once upon a time, those kids were little babies in their mother's arms, too. Just like mine. Just like yours. What happened between then and now?

Not enough people told them no.
Not enough folks held them accountable for their actions.
There were too many people making excuses for them, not demanding enough of them. Not enough respect, not enough contribution, not enough compassion.

And God's going to strike me dead for saying such a thing, but I'm even including the poor woman being tortured, among the group responsible for kids like this. An adult. In a position of authority. Not making them stop. Not taking down names.

As a group, we adults bemoan what has happened to "kids these days." We've shaped them, and yet we're displeased with the results:

*They're overweight, and yet adults are the ones placing sugar-filled vending machines in the cafeterias and plopping chicken nuggets and french fries on their lunch trays.
*They're too sedentary, but it's the adults giving them all the electronic gadgets under the moon and stars with no limitations on usage.
*We encourage them to do their best, but we're sure to heap praise and medals on them for their "participation."
*We want them to pay attention in class, and study, but when they get a 72% on a test, we slap a gold star on the paper and write "Good effort!"
*We expect them to be polite and well-mannered, but don't hold them accountable when they're not.

We as adults need to demand more of our kids. We get lazy and tired and don't feel like doing battle, but when we don't, this is the kind of thing that happens.













(Quotes by Lori Berger)



Let's ALL of us adults make a pact that we WILL NOT TOLERATE this any longer! Teachers, principals, bus drivers and monitors, store clerks, security guards, health professionals, coaches, parents, aunts, uncles, grandparents, neighbors.

Let's expect more.

Let's hold them accountable.



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8 comments:

  1. Really...really...disturbing! The system that has prevented, and tied the hands of those in CHARGE at school to discipline this type of behavior with more than a few days of suspension is to blame as well. Something is broken. Bullying will take place anytime and anywhere it is "allowed". Sad thing is IF she had taken names and verbally reprimanded them SHE would be the one being called a bully, and "inappropriate". If the bus driver stopped the bus, and called the parents on the spot to come and pick them up, she probably would have lost her job. Time for a wake up call, and the realization that "in the good old days" this would never have been tolerated for one second! Thanks for the post!

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  2. Rooster Inn, you are so right, they are taking WAY too much authority out of those in charge, and then crying that things are getting out of hand. It seems no one can give a harsh word for a kid nowadays, not for performing poorly on a test, not for being disrespectful, not for bullying. They have complete free rein. It's got to stop.

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  3. It's such a complicated matter. Before you said it I was also thinking ..."what happened?"...I always have these really deep philisophical convos with DH when something awful happens say on the news....I always put myself say in the adults shoes...I was bullied something horrific growing up..to the tune of a bus driver taking me to my front door...melting candle wax on moms car in middle of night that said $lut...i didn't even know many people....In hindsight i don't hate those kids. i grew up in a rough place and feel those kids did not get the parental care taking they so deserve...i so deserved. no one stuck up for me.No one called the school. ..

    I often see these kids as "hurt"..I am not saying that gives them full reigns..it's just when you feel everything in your life is so out of your control...then here are these kids..and they are doing "something" and if it is bad you are usually a welcome participant. If it is "cool" they will not give you the time of day....so here you are..a moment to feel "included" "part of something""..encouraged, high fived..smiles at..."

    Is it sick and twisted..of course it is....but i think esp when it is kids there are many other reasons behind the behavior than say "bad parenting...letting kids get away with murder etc"..These kids however do grow up to be adults and their anger only intensifies...then it is gangs...wrong crowd...etc..

    It's all so sad. I am just rambling. I guess I always tend to feel for the "broken"....it's an awful thing..like I said I was bullied for years...and no one helped me....

    just so messed up. I do think there are kids who are just "spoiled" and maybe feel "entitled" but again...where did that come from.

    MA once said(and of course Oprah too) "When you know better, you do better"...I truly believe that. Praying for all involved.

    Liz

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  4. Liz, you're right, it can be complicated. But bottom line? These kids were BEYOND in the wrong and there is no excusing it.

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  5. I didn't watch the video I should also disclose..only read about it..

    Liz

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  6. I recently came across your blog and have been reading along. I thought I would leave my first comment. I don't know what to say except that I have enjoyed reading. Nice blog. I will keep visiting this blog very often.

    Alena

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