Recipe for Preserving Children

This is from my favorite "Mom" book, Mitten Strings for God by Katrina Kenison:

Ingredients
1 grass-grown field
several dogs and puppies (if available)
pebbles and sand
1/2 dozen children or more
1 brook

Method
Into field, pour children and dogs, allowing to mix well.
Pour brook over pebbles until slightly frothy.
When children are nicely brown, cool in warm bath.
When dry, serve with milk and freshly baked gingerbread.