life on the funny farm

Thursday, June 3, 2010

My kingdom for some chocolate ....


Picking my youngest up from school today, I got a call on my cell phone from my oldest. It seemed demons were flying about the house wreaking havoc and destruction. In my most soothing and wisdom-infused Mom's voice I did what I could to bring a peace over hearth and home, but just before the call vanished in a wisp of static I could still hear screaming and fussing and general unrest.
Nearly out of gas, I pulled into a station and began pouring cash into the tank (it seems to prefer small bills to gasoline) and my ears were immediatley assaulted with pleas for something to drink because of extreme end-stage dehydration.
The "no" was perched on my lips, but then I thought, know what? I could use something medicinal right about now to soothe my frayed nerves.
"Here honey, here's some money. You go inside and get yourself a slushy, and while you're in there, get Mommy some chocolate, would you?"
I went back to pumping cash, but with a wee smile playing at the corners of my mouth, and a slight trickle of anticipatory drool.
I got back in the car just as my child was coming out of the store, purchases in hand. My eyes gleamed.
He got in the car....
He handed me my contraband....
I looked down in the hopes of seeing a MIlky Way, or perhaps a Twix. Maybe even a good old-fashioned unadulterated Hershey Bar. What I got was....
Ultimate Fiber Bar, + Antioxidants.

What the....?

Truth be told, if I looked closely at the package, I could discern bits of what could pass for chocolate mixed in with all that substantial fiber.
But it wasn't what I had in mind. I thanked my child, but couldn't even bring myself to open it.
I headed home to break up the chaos and repair any damaged egos and/or furniture, head hung low.

Guess chocolate and I just weren't fated to be together today.

My hips are thankful, but my lips are holding a grudge.....

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